Alot to say

Well I have alot to say right now, and alot of people to thank for everything they have done for me. I know that I haven't been able to do as good this year as I would like to have. I lost people who where very dear to me. I temperarily lost the ability to dance as well as I have. My grades have suffered and the stress only keeps piling up. Needless to say its been a very hard year for me. I have a lot of reasons to be angry, but I'm not. I'm greatfull for the experience.

You know I've decided what to do with my life. I'm going to focus on my dancing. I want to make a career of it. Maybe someday I'll open up my own studio. I actually do have someone to thank for this decition. For just believing in me. It made me want to prove you everyone that I can. I doubt he knows how much it ment to me and I honestly don't know if I will actually ever see him again. His name is Dax and he is on stage crew at our school. We were talking after our ballroom festival at school and the fact that he thought I could do it felt amazing. He's that stanger that passes through your life who changes its course without even knowing. SO thank you Dax for believing in me.

I also want to thank Christian and Hillary. My old coaches. They have really tought me so much and not just about ballroom. They willl be mentors and second parents to me. They believe in me and push me. They are the reason I am who I am. The reason I want to persue dance and ballroom. I want to make them proud. I want to show them that I can. They are who I dance for every day.

I also want to thank my current coach, Andy. He truely makes me feel like I have something to prove. I want to show him just how great of a dancer I really can be and what I really can do. I feel like he doesn't quite realize it. In his own way he pushes me to always be doing my best. and I am greatful for that.

I want to thank Ryan. For making me stronger. For pulling me out of the dark place I was in. Its not a place anyone wants to be in. I really don't know Where i'm supposed to go from here. I know there are many more challenges and I don't know where I will end up. But I am greatfull that he's been there. Thats all I've needed.

I want to thank my dance partner, Michael, for being sweetly supportive and understanding this whole year. I will never forget him. I'll tell you now. A dance partner like that is amazing and you end up with a relationship that is so unique and unexplainable. The bond between you and your partner is strong. Its a conpletely different and rare kind of love. And I thatnk him for being there and being patient while I've gone through some really rough trials.

I wnat to thatn my friends. Jessie, Emily, Kyle, Josh, Maddie. All of them for just being there and listening. I've been twiterpatted, Hurt, completely crazy, and so much more and they stick with me through it all. I'm sure they get sick of me at times but what else are friends for right?

Lastly I want to thank or Heavenly Father for placing these people in my life. I know he has a plan for me and loves me. I may not always understand but i'm greatfull for all the lesons he is teaching me. I don't know where I would be or if I would even be here if where not for these people in my life. Always there when I need them. Always knowing what I need.

I know its alot of thank you's but I'm very greatfull to them right now. I know threre is a reason they are all in my life Even if i don't know why or how or anything that will happen later in my life they have influenced it alot. In a good way. Thank you to everyone who has ever put up with my razy sef. I love you all. You guys mean the world to me.

Wonderful Things

Well I've been feeing alot better. However I did recently go through a very hard time. Miles left, it was a pretty bad breakup, and I still don't understand. I nedded him the most at the time and he left me alone on the side of the road cause he didn't want to deal with me. I was upset and sick and depressed and it really didn't help. Every promise broken.
I want to tell you what happened to pull me out of that deppression and crazyness. It really is quit amazing. My friend Emily told me to talk this kid named Ryan. He is her Fiance's cousin. He is amazing and funny and helped me alot. Its funny cause that same day I had just told Miles (cause I couldn't let go of him.) that I couldn't deal with everthing that I had been going through. The timing was perfect, I was about to break.
Anyway I talked to him and slowly fell for him the entire time (cheesy I know).  He just always knows just what to say or  do to make me feel better. He really has been so good to me and for me. I find myself more and more facinated by him each and every day.
He lives quite a ways away so I can't see him every day. I wish I could though, but he came out for thankgiving and I got to spend almost the entire weekend with him. We talked alot and just hung out. We also discovered that our feelings for eachother are mutual. it means alot to have someone in your life who really truly cares and you know will be there no matter what. Especially when you need them.
With everything so perfect I can't not beleive that Heavenly Father sent us to eachother. My testimony is stronger now then it ever has been and my heart sings with praise and joy with every thought. I have alot to be thankfull for. I know the Lord answered my prayers in sending Ryan. I needed a way for myself to be able to deal with what I was going through and I was given that, almost had it taken away when I could no longer go forward. The trial is still there, and my heart still aches. I know that I'm scared and hesitant but I also know I'm where I need to be. I know that Heavenly Father is there for us ans I know He answers our prayers. I find it truly amazing just what he can do for us. Even if its in a very unexpected way.

Dance is finally starting up again so happy :). However we do have a new coach, I'm still not sure what I should be calling him. Any way he is doing this thing to get the students more involved in creating the show. He is having auditions for student choreographed formation and solo numbers. I have decided to do both. My solo partner is Micheal. Who i am also competing open Latin with. I am so excited for dance this year and to push myself as hard as I can. I really want to try to do more than I think that I am physically able to do. Its gonna be awesome to discover how far I can really go.
I'm still having a hard time without Christian and Hillary though. I really miss them and the way they ran team. it was so organized and fun. We always knew what was going on. Its even harder now that they've moved away. I understand that they had to, but I really miss them. I really look up to them and I hope I have always done them proud and always will. I want to be the best I can be for them.
This summer has been hard on me. Turns out I have something called on ovarian cyst. It hurt to do much at all. Every month it would make me sick. Being diabetic its not a good thing to be sick. I almost literally sat on the couch the entire summer watching TV. Its doing better now. I can dance and do things. but it still hurts quite a bit.
This year I am doing the Walk To Cure Diabetes. Basically we walk for a little ways and people sponsor our walk. It raises millions of dollars a year. All our proceeds go to JDRF for the research on the cure, prevention, and better care of diabetes. This is a really really great cause And I would love you all to donate too it. Go to http://www2.jdrf.org/site/PageServer?pagename=walk_homepage and fill out the donations slot. My team is called Ari's Hero's. The state is in Utah. My name is Ariana Buttars. My personal goal is to raise $150. I've only reached $70 of it and the walk is now only two weeks away. Any and all help is appreciated.

General Conference

General Conference weekend, Latter Day Saints from around thee world stop and watch or listen to our leaders. Our prophet talks to all of us as well as the  general church leaders. I am aware that most people who are not L.D.S. think that we are strange and restrictive. But these "restrictions" are there to protect us, to allow us to keep our agency. We only need to obey  our commandments. The scriptures tell us what we need to know. We can pray for help. I know that god our heavenly father hears us and answers our prayers. I know that Joseph Smith restored the gospel of Jesus Christ and saw God and Jesus Christ. I know that Thomas S Monson is really a prophet called of god. I know that revelation is shown to those of us who are faithful and who ask for it. I know that the Book of Mormon is true, and I don't really care if you agree or not. this is what I belive what I know to be true and no one can chang my mind. I do my best to obey the comandments set in place for me. I know I make mistaakes but  I can always repent and have my sins taken away and I can be clean again, "though your sins may be as scarlet they shall be white as snow, though they are red as crimson they shall be as wool" Isaiah 1:18. I testify of Jesus Christ the only begotten son of the Father. I know these things are true. Amen

Just After Easter

You know its been a little while. But hey life's been crazy. My coaches don't work a my school anymore. Its really sad because these coaches took us to be the top High School Latin Formation Team I'm not sure what will happen next year, with new coaches I don't know where we will go. Maybe we will do well and maybe not but that doesn't mean we won't stick together. I'm over it now, at least enough to not be sad. I have actually  had a lot happen lately... Josh is leaving in less than a month on his mission. In just over a year miles will leave. All my guy friends will be leaving within the next two years and I will be off to collage... I'm still not sure what collage I'll go too but I have a few options. We'll see how it all lays out. In a way I'm excited what the future will bring me. But I'm also scared because I don't know what exactly lies ahead. I want to graduate from collage, and I want to get married in an L.D.S. temple. That's what I believe in. I want an eternal family. It means a lot to me even if others don't think that.

I know I probably don't post as much as I should but I get distracted with other things being a teenager. A lot has happened since my last post. I've got a new best friend. His name is Josh and he has helped me through a lot already. Josh used to be my friend a while ago but we kind of fell apart. But we are talking again, and I'm glad to be.
Things are about to get really busy for me. This is the time of year that all the major ballroom stuff comes up. By next week I'll be practicing everyday, and we've already doubled our practice time. Oh well, it's really exciting for me anyway, and I love this time of year.
I just want to get a bunch of thoughts out right now. Things can be hard. In fact at the beginning of this week things got especially hard. But I've learned that you have to get up when you fall. Even when it hurts more then the fall. I've learned how all our trials are here to make us better, and there isn't one that you can't get through. We all have friends to help  us when things get rough, and even if you feel like there isn't a friend or a family member you can talk to your still never alone. Our savior is always there for us, and He always will be. Our Father in Heaven and His son will never abandon us. I've learned this week and I know, that if your burden is too much for you to handle. If your on the verge of breaking, of falling apart. They will help you. They always will.

I am so thankful for all the people I am blessed with. For I truly feel blessed. you might say I have so much to be bitter about. and its true I do, no ones life is perfect. But, the trick, is looking at all the things that you do have. All the beautiful things in the world. True there might be a lot of ugliness but look at the trees and birds and wonderful creatures that share this world with us. Not everything is ugly. Knowing this is what gets me by day by day. Beauty and happiness, friends and family. Love. Remember this it really means a lot and helps you be happy. I'll talk to you later. Bye! :)

Story...

Okay so I attempted NaNoWriMo for those of you who don't know what that is, it is National Novel Writers Month. Basically you have to write 50,000 words during the month of November  I know your wondering so no, I did not reach that goal. Anyway here is my first three pages I would like you to comment and tell me what you think. I'll love any comments you give me.






PROLOGUE




The griffin screeched as it landed on the tall mountain overlooking the island that served as it’s home. The griffin scanned around the island and focused the single roof that poked up out of the forest.
That roof irritated the griffin. It wasn't supposed to be there. The

griffin didn't know how the humans had survived long enough on the island to have built it. Nor did it know how they had had the means. It tended to keep humans off the island as much as possible. But it would deal with those pesky humans later, then the house. There was a storm coming and it had to take shelter.
Disappearing into a grove of trees the griffin went underground. The island had several openings. The griffins “burrow”. The griffin continued down the dark tunnel, leading farther and deeper into the mountain. The griffin suddenly stopped, as if alarmed. A soft noise was echoing through the tunnels.
It was a human child. The griffin sniffed the air, it could smell their usual acrid scents of man made products. They were in the tunnels. The griffin didn't like humans, they were tolerable though. At least until they entered its home. The griffin followed the now louder noise, and acrid scent, then it saw them. Human children.

It tensed, ready to attack. That’s when he saw the woman. She was
Short and skinny, she had tanned skin with brown hair and blue eyes. She was obviously their mother. The griffin could tell by the way they clung to her like she was their whole world. And they were about to find out just how scary that world could be.
The griffin readied itself to attack once more, annoyed at the distraction. Then Suddenly seemingly out of nowhere, the griffin charged. The only thing the woman and children would have seen was something huge barreling at them. Then their worlds where as black as a moonless night.




CHAPTER 1


I put the last bit of clothes into my suitcase. I was almost done. I grabbed my sketch book and threw it in as well. Knowing  would want it. I looked around the to make sure nothing was missing.
I loved the light blue walls and dark stained oak furniture, but I felt trapped. The only thing I really had at the moment was my job. Not that I didn't like my job. I was a ranger for the national forest my house. But I was glad that I took the offer for a cruise. I needed a break
I left my room and wandered around my house it was probably too big for one person but the place meant a lot to me, and I could afford it since I was only supporting myself.
I froze when I saw the bright blue picture frame sitting on the side table in the living room. I stared at it long past the time tears started their sad journey down my cheeks.



Thank you for reading this it means a lot to me. Please tell me what you think. Bye!